The Unwanted Upgrade

For those of us who work on multi-class jets, passenger upgrades are a daily occurrence. High flyers cash in miles and others will shell out hard-earned cash at the gate for those coveted seats. Also, we rightfully offer automatic upgrades to those passengers who have dedicated their lives to defending our nation. To me, that’s fine and well deserved. They’ve earned that right and are not the subject of this article. My target are those who fall into the category of “the unwanted upgrade” and can be a great source of annoyance once inflight.

A couple of years ago, the flights were fuller than today and it wasn’t an issue. Today, with more open seats on flights due to the economic down-turn, “the unwanted upgrade” is becoming more common place. For some reason, many gate agents are feeling the need to fill those seats with people (even when they don’t pay for or are deserving of them). Whether it’s the agent taking a liking to someone at the gate or someone who just makes their lives a living hell until they just do it to shut the pax up, they inevitably become a nuisance for the crew on their flight. I’m probably starting to sound like a snob. I’ll be the first to admit to it. However, I feel when I’m working First or Business Class on a jet, the majority of my time and energy should be dedicated to those who pay top dollar or high mileage for their special treatment.

Case in point: months ago, I was working a flight from JAX to ORD. Four passengers boarded the jet and we settled them into First Class. They were polite, friendly, un-assuming and courteous. You could tell they knew their way around an airport. They declined my offers of pre-flight beverages and, after we shared a laugh or two, proceeded to open their laptops and get in as much work as possible. Upon inspecting the manifest, it was revealed that they had all achieved the highest levels that our airline bestows upon a frequent flyer. I smiled to myself and thought “NICE! This will be a fun and easy flight.” All of that changed about 10 minutes later. Suddenly, two more guys charged onto the plane, uttered insults my way about the airline industry and then plopped themselves into First Class. The next thing they said to me was “Hey, stewardess (did they forget I’m a guy or the fact that the word “stewardess” hasn’t been used in decades?), I hope you have a lot of liquor because we got free upgrades and plan to clean out your bar before the end of the flight.” It was at this moment that I could feel my blood pressure begin to rise. The four frequent flyers looked at me, rolled their eyes in complete disgust and tried to go back to work. When I offered them pre-flight beverages, both ordered double Jacks on the rocks. I filled their order and then turned around to do something in the galley. Barely 2 minutes passed when I heard their call buttons go off in unison. I started walking towards them, but both just raised their glasses and shook them in front of me as to signal they wanted more. Now, I like to keep my passengers happy, but know there’s a line between keeping passengers happy and creating a dangerous situation with alcohol. My concern was they were already obnoxious, but how bad would it become if they became too drunk. Against my better judgment, I relented. Finally, the gate agent came down the jetbridge. I looked at her and asked, “My manifest only shows 4 people in First. How did those guys get upgraded?” She just looked at me, pulled me as far away from them as possible, and said, “I had no choice. They just hung around my podium and badgered me until I finally gave in and upgraded them.” I quickly reminded her that she did have a choice and she just made my job a living hell for the next 2 hours. She then told me that she wouldn’t do anything about this and if I wanted them off, I’d have to involve my captain and the delay would be placed on me. By that point, I just wanted out of there before I violated some federal law by throwing a heavy object at her. I then alerted my captain that they could be a potential problem. He was not happy with the gate agent either but didn’t want to take a delay. He asked if I could handle them during the flight. I said I definitely could, but asked for his assurance that he’d back me in any decision I made dealing with the guys inflight. He agreed and instructed that if they gave me any serious trouble to alert him immediately and he’d have security waiting at the gate in ORD.

Well, some of the antics I had to endure included: the guys pressing their call buttons during take-off to demand I risk my safety by getting out of my jumpseat to give them more Jacks (I refused), throwing their popcorn and other snacks all over the floor, spilling drinks all over each other and the floor and finally throwing temper tantrums when I finally cut them off from drinking (won’t even discuss them badly singing Country Music loudly). When we finally landed (I’ve taken flights from ORD to FRA that seemed to take less time), the first class seats they were in looked liked the inside of a movie theater right after the matinee of a children’s movie. There was food just thrown everywhere. The frequent flyers expressed their extreme displeasure over the whole situation (especially when they heard the pax telling me they had received free upgrades). I apologized profusely to them and did everything to save my airline’s reputation in their eyes. They also assured me they knew this wasn’t my fault and felt I did everything I could. They all said they planned to file formal complaints with my airline about this situation. I helped them by making sure they had the full name of the gate agent who caused this whole un-necessary mess in the first place.

I wish I could say this was an isolated incident, but sadly it isn’t. If it’s not the obnoxious hillbillies mentioned above, it’s the mom with the infant/toddler whom the gate agent takes pity upon and upgrades to first class. The people in First who truly deserve to be there are forced to endure shrieking children, cheerios (and other food) thrown at them, smelly dirty diapers, etc. Again, my flights ended with some VERY unhappy frequent flyers and full- fare passengers. In these cases, I was once again forced to go into damage control on behalf of my airline. I thought I’d left damage control duty behind when I exited the corporate world, but once again, it’s been presented before my very eyes to clinch my teeth and deal with. It’s never a pretty situation (regardless of the industry) especially because I’m not paid anywhere near the amount to do damage control here as I was in my previous profession. .

I don’t want to appear heartless. There are upgrades I think we’re both in agreement on. If you have a UM, feel free to put the kid up front. If you have a passenger with physical impairments, keep them in front because it’s easier for them to get on and off of the jet. If you have newlyweds, upgrade them up and I’ll do my best to make the beginning of their marriage as memorable as possible. Even though they reject every special comfort I offer them, military should have priority over everyone on the plane. They are putting their lives on the line to defend our nation and I will treat them better than I do the high-end frequent flyers (to their credit, many frequent flyers have offered their first class seats to military—my hat’s off to you).

The majority of gate agents out there are on the same page as the flight crew. They know that the flight crew wants to do everything in our power to make your high-stress job as easy as possible and know that you want the same for the flight crew and that we’re working together for a common good (preserving all of our jobs). However the gate agents who persist in these mercy upgrades need to realize that their actions have repercussions that go way beyond making my life unpleasant. These actions run the risk of alienating those frequent flying passengers who are the financial lifeline of our airlines. To alienate those people is a sure-fire path towards economic disaster.

Till the next time.

Goodbye and Fly Safe Everyone,

Dino

Dino Demilo is a career airline employee and an avid off duty traveler. He spends his work days as part of a flight crew crisscrossing North American for a commercial airline and his off days going anywhere in the world he can grab a free flight with friends and a great hotel deal. He is a regularly featured contributor at Airline Devils where you can find free travel and career resources in an online community for airline professionals that includes terms, airport information, trip ideas and of course airline jobs.

Author Profile: Dino_Dimilo

first class travel, airline jobs, career challenges, airline upgrades